Positive Flow.

I went to jam last week, and I gotta say, it was probably the best jam I have been to all year.  Then again, I think I have only gone to one other jam this year and left cause it was buggy and I didn’t know a single face there.


However, my mood for the night was actually a good one.  I felt very “open” and “receptive” to whatever. . . I was my usual fun self, which was a nice change from the standoffish closed scrutinizing person I have been. ( I don’t like that person.)


The crowd was pretty much all of my old flow peeps, so I am sure that had something to do with it.  There were also a gaggle of younger girls with hoops kind of off to one end of the park, just kind of hanging, so a few of us “oldies” went and introduced ourselves and told them to just come over and flow with us.  The girls seemed a bit hesitant, and pretty much kept to themselves the whole night, but you know, I didn’t give a shit.

I didn’t get caught up in their insecurities and hang ups.

Which is something that I know I have been doing for way too long.  Getting hung up in insecurities and what not.



I got in some good flowness with my hoop, and even picked up the poi for a bit.  Something I haven’t done since I performed my poi number for the Burlesque show. . . loooong ago.  (when was that?  I can’t even remember.)


A friend of mine was trying to teach me some butterfly variations, but it just felt like I was going to whack myself in the face.  I def need to work on my planes, especially my left, because I have all kinds of wonkiness going on.  But I would like to get the Crystal cases for my flow lights.  (which I hardly ever use, because of not having said cases.) I am hoping that once I get off my duff to do so, then it will be a big motivator to poi more.


A friend of mine had also busted out his ninja poi (which we had gotten him for his birthday) and those are pretty bad ass.  I would like me some of those.



However, word on the street now, is that they have poi that can spell out words and pictures and so forth.

I even felt a slight itch to burn.  But due to fire restrictions, it didn’t happen that night and by the time night rolled around I was pretty tired and wanted to get home.

All and all if felt pretty good to be in a good flow state.  There was good peeps, good jams, and just goodness all around.


Yet I think to the key to all that, again, was keeping an open and positive state of mind.   I hate that I have been feeling so bogged down lately, pulled into stupid worries and trying to control everything.

From here on out I am starting to be more positive.  I am looking towards all the things I am grateful for, no matter how insignificant or mundane they may be.  Nothing in life should be taken for granted.




Where I’m At.

I haven’t done much hooping.  (surprise surprise.) though I did bust  out my hoop one day last weekend?  Two weekends ago?  and had a good jam session to the Isley Brother’s “Footsteps in the Dark.”

I’m a bit obsessed with that song.  I feel it, and can dig it on a personal level.  Truth be told, at times I still feel like my boyfriend is being a schmuck.  But you know, it kind of makes me a schmuck for putting up with his schmuck-ness, right?  But those are MY feelings and I am owning them.  So take that for whatever it’s worth I suppose.

Even so, life has been quite busy busy busy, yet at the same time boring boring boring.  I had a birthday last month.  (yeah me!) and it was pretty good. . . although i was a bit disappointed that I did not receive any flow toys (like a new LED hoop that I so hinted about.  😛 ) However I DID get a new monkey light for my bike, and i guess technically you could count that as “flow” related. . . to some degree. . .maybe.


Our local jams are back outside, situated every Thursday right on the Lake.  I think I attempted one, and it was so buggy that I lost interest and joined up with a LARP group that was wielding foam swords and shields.  Just for the record, that is some uber nerdery if I ever came across some.


I’ve also been having an ongoing medical issue, that seems to have no explanation.  I have been pissing blood now for about the past 5 months.  So far we have ruled out any type of infection and kidney stones.  I’ve had an IVP and a Cat scan, and tomorrow I go for a cystoscopy.  Which sounds like oh so much fun.

(most of all this I have mentioned in another of my blogs, but in case anyone cares to know, not that I have oodles of followers, nor do I really care.)

And lastly I started the long over due process of getting another tattoo.  I am getting Ganesh on my side, and let me just tell you. . . This bitch hurts like a motherfucker.  I don’t know what I was thinking (other than it looks kinda sexy in that spot.) I had thought that the shading and coloring wouldn’t hurt as bad as the outline, but I was so wrong.  I have two more sessions to go before it’s completed. 


(The Outline. . . I survived ok.)


(coloring and shading. . . I lost my bearings.)

So there you go.  Not a post really about hooping, but you know, I hoop it up when I feel like it.  And that’s ok with me.  For now.