Yippity Yappity

I’ve noticed I’m not so inclined to post much here like I once did.  The whole doing this from my phone is a huge deterrent.

I think about a lot of things I’d like to yip yap about.  I’ll start a post and then half way through I become quite ehhhhhhh about it.  I tell myself I’ll finish it later, and then weeks go by before I ever go back to it.  More times than naught, when I re-read whatever I was blabbering on about, I feel it’s not as important as when I first felt it was.

So I have quite a few drafts sitting around.  Waiting for fruition. 

I can’t really complain about anything in my life at the moment.  Other than my missing my cat…. Life has taken on a quiet and almost peaceful existence.

I get stressed out here and there… Mostly about my insecurities surrounding my burlesque and hooping…. But that’s because I create that stress.

Like I told a friend recently, there is stuff going on in my life… But then it’s not really much to go into great depth about.  It’s all pretty cut and dry.

And that’s cool.

I have two more shows left for this year, both of which are benefit shows…. And then it’s a four month burlesque hiatus…. Which I am looking forward to incredibly.

OK.  I lied.  I did half agree to do another benefit show in February.  That is If I don’t get a part in a show… As I plan to use this down time to try and get back into theater. 

We shall see how that goes.

Anywho…. That’s what I got for this moment. 

Watch “Hula Hoop Tutorial Catwalk Profi deutsch” on YouTube

Hula Hoop Tutorial Catwalk Profi deutsch: http://youtu.be/GNNg2k81S7Q

I was given the task of hooping for a  half hour a day from my sir whilst he is away on bidness.  (That’s business).  Ha!  :p

I accept his challenge, as I need more “discipline” in my hooping.  

Since I’m always bitching about how I always feel inadequate in my skill level.

So I found this video and thought it something neat to do.  Especially for those spaces I don’t have much room to hoop about In. 

I have another show coming up and need some saucy moves.

Maybe We Don’t Need to Love Ourselves First. | elephant journal

http://www.elephantjournal.com/2014/10/maybe-we-dont-need-to-love-ourselves-first/

I love this.

Some good points to consider.

When I was in my last relationship, a lot of people would point or that I needed to love myself more… To respect myself more… It was never that I didn’t.  Sure I probably deserved better…. But I didn’t stay for as long as I did due to lack of self worth.

I stayed longer because of my knowing of my worth…. Which I consider to be great.  Why he didn’t “see” it or “get” it was beyond me.  At the time I was hell bent on proving my awesomeness to someone who didn’t give a shit how awesome I was or not….. Because it was never about me…. It was always about them.

Anyways, I may have gone off track… But… I always find that I learn the most about myself when I find myself in a relationship.  Its those challenges of learning to love in a mature and healthy way.  Learning how to be compassionately honest with someone   Learning to trust and be outside of yourself, and of course the intimate vulnerability of placing all that in the hands and heart of another.

It’s then we find those parts of ourselves