Indefinitive Diagnosis.

My Urologist called last night to discuss my pathology report.  Something about the wording of it wasn’t sitting right with him and he wanted to “clarify” exactly what was meant in the report.

As I said, when he went in to probe my kidney, he was not expecting to find a tumor there.  All the scans and testing done previously had not shown that anything was there.  Not even a “shadow”.

So when he was faced with this mass in my kidney, he was incredibly surprised.  The sample he collected and sent off to the lab was apparently not substantial enough to make any kind of diagnosis.

So while carcinoma cells WERE detected in the sample, the pathologist felt that there was not enough of “sample”, to make a clear defined diagnosis.

So what does it mean?

Beats the hell out of me.

It now means I may or may not actually have cancer.  *sigh*

(I sigh because It’s not like i really wanted to have cancer. . . but wish that they would make up their minds.  Yes or no??)

Because of the sample, it’s a Definite Maybe.

He went on to say that even though there were 3 things listed on the report as being “detected” (abnormal cells and carcinoma being two of those three.  Don’t exactly remember what the 3rd was) It could be any of the above.  So the Pathologist, couldn’t say “exactly” which of the 3 it was, based off the sample.

My Urologist said that in his experience, that if its showed up on the report, then it IS there.

However, HE can’t make a definitive diagnosis based off the pathologists diagnosis.

Is any of this making sense?

We talked about how, even though NOW they can’t say it is, or isn’t, the fact is, I still have this tumor, and I still have this unexplained bleeding coming from my left kidney. In his opinion, he feels that is enough reason to still proceed with the removal of it.

But hold on.

The unexplained bleeding. . . is now  lessening.  So much so, that I am almost having “normal” looking urine.

(as opposed to the Cola colored to bright red color that I’ve been experiencing for the past 5 months.)

I’d like to buy the world one.

I just noticed this the other day.  (It makes me wonder if this cunning and conniving tumor knows that it’s about to get the boot and is trying to make it seem like it was all my imagination that it’s there.)

I don’t know if something was loosened when he did the probe, and now I am getting. . . uh, you know, ummm. . . free clean flow, so to speak?

If the case is, that this tumor IS benign, then maybe i don’t NEED to have my whole kidney taken out.

Maybe part of it was just blocking the way?

My urologist felt pretty confident in saying that he would not be surprised in the least if they took out the kidney and they did in fact find cancer in it.

However, I would hate to have the kidney removed, and then they find out that it wasn’t cancerous at all.

I’m out a kidney.  That’s not good.

Ugh.  It’s just a big mess.  I don’t know what to do.

I would go for a second opinion, however, to have to go  through ALL the same tests again, to possibly come out to the same conclusion (cancer/tumor) 3 months later. . . to learn what I already know NOW, and to waste time in getting it out of me. . . I’m not sure I can afford that.

With my job ending soon (that’s another story) I am not sure how much longer I am going to have my medical insurance, and really need to take full advantage of it while I can.

Anywho, I go again on the second back to see the Urologist to talk face to face and to make a decision.

Stupid Kidney.  Stupid tumor.